By
Kathryn A. Kopple
It’s
so nice to be here with all of you tonight celebrating the life and career of
David Bowie. My name is Kathryn. I am a contributor to the anthology My Bowie
Story. My Bowie Story is called "A
Reality Tour." A Reality Tour was, as we
know, the last time Bowie toured, and I felt lucky to have been able to see him. It was as if Bowie and I had gone
full circle. You see, my Bowie story
began many years before, in a small town, an isolated town; it was so small and
so isolated that we had no highway that could connect us to the outer
world. If you wanted to get to the
highway that would take you to New York or Boston, you had to drive at least an
hour.
When
you grow up in a place that isolated, not only is it hard to get out but it’s
hard for things to get in. You just
don’t know what’s going on outside your small town. When you are a teenager, it’s only natural as you stand in your small-town parking lot in front of the Grand Union, watching shoppers go about their business, that you wonder what people in the wider
world are doing. You wonder about what
people your own age are doing. What
clothes do the kids in Boston wear? What kind of
parties do the kids in New York have? What sort of music do they listen to in Philadelphia?
Where I
lived, music was something that happened elsewhere. There was no music scene, unless
you count the high school chorus, and I wasn’t in chorus. My situation was complicated by the
fact that we weren’t allowed to listen to rock 'n roll in my house. Rock 'n roll was forbidden. It wasn’t that rock n’ roll was the devil’s
music. My parents weren’t religious. My family wouldn't permit rock 'n roll in the house for different reasons. Rock 'n roll was
terrible for you; it was terrible music, noise.
It would ruin you. If you
listened to rock 'n roll, you would never know how to recognize truly great music--that was, classical music.
The pressure to conform was tremendous but I sensed my parents were wrong: rock 'n roll was great music, and if there was great rock 'n roll out there, I was going to find it.
Which brings me around to Kathy F. Often, back then, I took refuge at Kathy F’s house. Kathy was my best friend, and I basically lived at her house. I was never happier than at Kathy's house because there you were free--free to be an American,free to
be a young American. You were allowed to listen to rock 'n roll. No judgement.
The
most formative musical experiences of my life took place at Kathy’s house. One night, Kathy and I were in our sleeping bags on the living room floor and I looked up at the
TV, and there he appeared: Ziggy
Stardust. He was singing and he was leaning into the
song, leaning so close that I thought he would lean right out of the television
and into Kathy’s living room. Of this, I
was convinced. Ziggy would come out of
the TV and into Kathy’s living room, and he would take us by the hand,
and we would go with him to wherever he came from. No questions asked. Because wherever Ziggy Stardust came from had to be wonderful and beautiful because Ziggy was wonderful and beautiful.
And
then, Ziggy disappeared.
And
David Bowie went on to make a lot of great music but I
confess I still hung onto Ziggy. What
can I say? It was true love.
When
I moved to Philadelphia, I went through a lot of changes. I finished graduate school. I married. I also became pregnant—all in the same year.
We
also moved out of Center City. I was a
little worried about leaving the city because growing up as I had I didn’t
want to be isolated. I needed to make sure that wherever we moved there was good transportation. A small borough not far west of Philly was that place. I remember standing in the center of town, and saying to my husband, "This town has everything a person could ask for:
three bars, a liquor store, and a movie theater. What's not to love?" My town also had one other thing to
recommend it: a video store.
A
really nice guy worked at the video store. When I went into the store, we would chat. His name was Frank. There was no expectation that we would
become good friends. I was pregnant with my first child. Frank had his own life.
One day, I
went into the video store and I heard David Bowie singing. I looked up at the video monitor, and there was Bowie singing “Heroes.” I turned to see Frank at the counter. "Do you like David Bowie?" His response was an immediate "OMG!" Instantly, we were friends. Bowie
friends.
I
gave birth, finally. Life became hyper-busy. Frank would call and we’d chat. Mostly,
we’d talk about Bowie. Bowie album
releases. News about Bowie. Bowie history. He told me about how important Bowie was to Philly and Philly to Bowie. Some of Bowie's most devoted fans were from Philly. Music to my ears.
When
my second child was about eight months old, my father died. As I write in my story in the anthology, "Your
father has died has to be the worst wake-up calls you can get." For me, it was
the worst call of my life.
People
talk a lot about how, when you are in a dark place, there is always light at the end
of the tunnel. But, for me, forget about light.
There wasn’t even a tunnel. There
was just darkness. I wasn’t coping with
my father’s death. I couldn’t pull
myself out of that dark place. I was
horribly anxious. Terrified.
About
seven weeks after I received the call that my father had died, Frank called. "Bowie’s coming." Bowie? When?
Where? I hoped he was coming to
Philadelphia. No, he was touring in
California. My heart dropped. I said to Frank, “I wish I
could go.” He said, “You are coming." I said, "It’s not going to happen." Where exactly was Bowie playing? Frank said, "L.A." I thought, Fabulous, you’re going to get to
see Bowie and I get to hear all about it. (I confess, I was bitter.) He said, "Stop it. You
are coming to see Bowie." "No," I repeated. "I
don’t have the time or money." When was the concert by the way? He said: "Next week."
Next week? I couldn't get to L.A. in
a week. He said, "Kathy, he’s going
to sing Ziggy Stardust."
Less
than a week later I was on a plane headed for LAX to see David
Bowie. I was on my way to see Bowie sing "Ziggy Stardust." I never thought I would hear Bowie sing "Ziggy Stardust" in my lifetime. I had abandoned that hope after the Serious Moonlight Tour. Along with "Ziggy," there were other songs I hoped he would sing, like "Oh,
You Pretty Things." I talk about the song in
the anthology. It’s such a great song,
always a favorite—and it reminds me of my dad.
I know. I know, that sounds incredibly Freudian. But understand, "Oh, You Pretty Things" is one of those Kurt Weill inspired songs--full of dark, creative energy. My dad was like that—a painter, an enormously creative person.
I arrived in L.A. on a Thursday. The concert was Saturday night. I had planned all
these spa activities, so I would be refreshed and rested for the concert. I had Frank take me to a yoga class. We went up to Malibu for lunch. We spent an afternoon at the Beverly Hills
Hot Springs and Spa.
Saturday
night, rested and rejuvenated, Frank and I got on the subway. We arrived the Wiltern, the small venue where the concert was held.
There were two women standing next
to me, and nearly overcome with emotion, I turned to them and gushed, "Hi, flew in from Philly two days
ago. I abandoned my husband and kids to see David Bowie tonight." They were so
excited. They congratulated me, hugged
me.
Lights went out. People started screaming. Bowie took the stage and kicked off the
concert with "Rebel, Rebel." Everyone started to dance. The theater filled with an intense
euphoria, and it was like that the entire
evening: one great song, and another, and another. You couldn’t have asked for more.
Then, alas, came the moment Bowie left the stage. People were clapping, stamping their feet, and calling out for him to come back.
I was screaming, "Ziggy, Ziggy, Ziggy!"
He returned and launched into “Heroes,” and that was beautiful (instantly, we were in church). I was holding hands with my new friends, and
crying, and even if we weren’t holding hands and crying, I believed we were. I believed the
whole theater was holding hands.
"Heroes" ended, the stage again empty, and I thought, Okay, it was a great
evening. He didn’t sing Ziggy, but what
a totally fantastic concert! Still, the
audience was determined to have Bowie come back.
Clapping, screaming.
He walked calmly onstage, picked up his guitar, and hearing the first chords of "Ziggy Stardust," I nearly fainted.
He walked calmly onstage, picked up his guitar, and hearing the first chords of "Ziggy Stardust," I nearly fainted.
The
next day, I got on a plane back to Philly. After landing, I took a cab home. I went inside. The place was a total wreck, but it wss okay. I hugged my kids. I went and said hello to my husband. He asked, “How was the concert?”
“It
was great. Really, really great
concert.”
"Did he play Ziggy Stardust?”
“He
did. He played Ziggy Stardust, live, in front of me.”
We
grew quiet for a moment before I said, “I feel
better, you know, all that stuff about my dad. I
feel like it’s going to be okay.”
My
husband was looking at me. I smiled. “Did I mention that I got to see
David Bowie sing Ziggy Stardust live?”
“Yeah,” he responded, “you mentioned that.”
We
grew quiet again. After a bit, I looked at
him and he looked at me, and I said, “Hey
babe, your hair’s alright. Hey babe, let's stay out tonight.”
Postscript: Kathryn's essay "A Reality Tour" can be found in the anthology My Bowie Story.
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